Sometimes, a lot of what you need to know about a movie can be garnered from taking a look at those who occupy the lower reaches of the cast list. This 3D remake of a 70s spoof boasts the following:

  • Trampoline Girl #2
  • Parasailing Girl
  • Wet T Shirt Host
  • Girl Cut In Half
  • Drunk Dumb Jock

In a nutshell, that kinda sums it up. This isn’t a movie that takes itself too seriously. From the off, we have Richard Dreyfuss sitting in a rowboat, singing Show Me The Way To Go Home. As the film reaches its denouement, there’s a vertigo zoom shot on the local law enforcement. Even the poster is a nod to Jaws.

The flimsy plot, such as it is, revolves around a lakeside resort as it prepares for the descent of hedonistic students for Spring Break, which just so happens to coincide with an underwater earthquake that opens up a fissure and introduces thousands of prehistoric, flesh-eating fish to the celebrations. And they’re hungry. Along the way, in an attempt to keep us interested, there’s the filming of the world’s lamest porno, a Wet T-Shirt competition, kids who go out on the water rather than stay at home and small town police who want to shut everything down and spoil everyone’s fun.

It’s perhaps no surprise to learn that the movie has problems. First and foremost, the 3D drains so much colour, some of the underwater scenes are essentially in pitch dark and it’s impossible to see what’s going on. Second, no one in the movie is up to much when it comes to acting. Third, even if they were, the script throws up some absolute dogs of lines.

That said, this sort of movie isn’t really going to be remembered for its acting or script. Where the film succeeds or fails is on the strength and originality of the deaths. At the start, they’re not really up to much and if anything, it’s all a little boring and not even an outrageous appearance from Christopher Lloyd is enough to make it interesting. However, there’s a moment about halfway through when a girl eaten arse first from the middle of a rubber ring and from there on in, director Alexandre Aja ups the gore and blood to ridiculous proportions and while it’s all completely over the top, it suddenly becomes quite good fun; particular favourite being the aforementioned Girl Cut In Half.

Thrown into the mix is a generous amount of female nudity. Kelly Brock has two talents, neither of which are acting, and she gives them both a decent airing throughout, particularly in an underwater ballet sequence to The Flower Duet that will keep fourteen-year-old boy happy and glued to their seats.

It’s not a train wreck in terms of, say, Ninja Assassin, and while it’s not particularly good and really, really, needs to be funnier, it still manages to be just about entertaining enough to be worth a look.